Nussle Unveils New Song to Help Re-Energize Iowa's PRIDE

When I shared my RAGBRAI stories with Jim, he feigned interest, bobbing his head like one of his George W. Bush bobble dolls, until a motif manifested. Jim noticed that I mentioned that in just about every town, some cover band played Lynyrd Skynyrd’s song, “Sweet Home Alabama.” Ironically, Iowans seemed to have adopted this southern pride ditty as their own, singing along with reckless abandonment at every road stop. Jim and I agreed that Iowa was long overdue for a good old fashioned rock-‘n’roll song that symbolizes Iowa’ pride. Since I am the idea man of this operation, Jim turned the task over to me and here’s what I've come up with as a draft-in-progress:

Sweet Home Iowa, by Jimmy the Hustler

Big deals keep on churning
Carry me home to my constituents
Singing songs about the heartland
I’m already missing D.C.’s influence
And I think it’s a sin, yes

Well I heard Mister Abramoff talk about her
Well, I heard ole Jack put her down
Well, I hope Jack Abramoff will remember
This good ole D.C. boy ain’t gonna pay him back anyhow

Sweet home Iowa
Where the skies once were blue
Sweet home Iowa
Corporate farmers, I’m coming home to roost

On Terrace Hill they love the Governor
Now we all did what we could do
Now adultery does not bother me
Does your conscience bother you?
Tell the truth

Sweet home Iowa
Where the people had work and paid their dues
Sweet home Iowa
Lord Vishnu, we’re sending more jobs to you
Here they come India

Now Steve King’s district has got the right wing
And they’ve been known to pick a wedge issue or two
Oh George they get me off so much
They contribute money when my wallet's feeling blue
Now how about you?

Sweet home Iowa
Where the gays will never marry
Sweet home Iowa
Some day George, I’ll come back to you

Sweet home Iowa
Oh sweet home baby
Where the state is now blue
And the governor’s true
Georgy
Georgy, I’ll come back to you
Yea, yea D.C.’s got all the answers

Running with Jim’s "Idea Raising" bit, feel free to add your own stanza in the comments, and let’s see if, together, we can craft a song all flag-wielding Iowans can be proud of singing.