One of my loyal peeps out in the political blogsphere alerted me to a web site for “the elevated player,” where you can enter your name and have it pimpified right in front of your very own eyes. As Jim and I know, the key to a good hustle and spinning webs of mass deception is adopting an image that commands respect on the one hand, while the other slips in and steals a vote with the other. On the stiletto heels of “The Pimp Almighty” poll, I thought it only fitting to plug in some names and see what the Pimpify machine kicked out. I first entered Jim Nussle’s name, and I kid you not, it kicked out, “President Nussle Kicks.” Now I told you Iowa was a mere stepping stone for the Jimster, and now you have yet another viable source.Here are some of the other Pimpified name results of noteworthy players:
Bob Vander Plaats:
Delicious Bob Dazzle (I’m thinking it’s never too late for Bob to make a name change before the election.)George W. Bush:
Dopetastic George WickedDonald Rumsfeld:
Treacherous D. SlimCharles Grassley:
Pimp Daddy Charles DazzleRonald Reagan:
Mr. White Chocolate SlimKarl Rove:
Master Pimp K. LuthorReady to get your A-game on, elevated player? Get your own pimp name: Pimpafy Here!